I think it's extra-hard to ask for literally something-for-nothing, especially when it's a tangible item.
For me, anyway, there's also a penalty if my personal incompetence created the situation in the first place. Of course, dropping something != personal incompetence, but I know that when I drop something, I don't think "ah, I observe that an object has slipped from my grasp"; I actually think "I am clumsy and stupid". (It is fascinating that despite years of being trained to think scientifically, when it comes to self-assessment that intellectual rigor all goes out the window and I easily infer major character defects from as few as one data point.) But my point actually was that it's harder to ask for a replacement iPad if I dropped the first one than if it got trampled by stampeding antelope or something.
There's also the fact that the person you're asking for the free thing, while they do have formal authority to give it to you, is not personally the owner of the thing. I feel a lot less uncomfortable accepting a free sandwich from the owner of the falafel truck than from her nephew if he's minding the store while she's elsewhere.
It does get easier if I know that there's an Official Policy that I should get a free thingy if I ask for it. It felt ridiculous to ask my credit card bank to waive a late fee for no reason other than I didn't want to pay it, until I knew that it was official policy to waive late fees for anyone who asked.
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branchandroot
no subject
Date: 2011-10-17 03:04 am (UTC)For me, anyway, there's also a penalty if my personal incompetence created the situation in the first place. Of course, dropping something != personal incompetence, but I know that when I drop something, I don't think "ah, I observe that an object has slipped from my grasp"; I actually think "I am clumsy and stupid". (It is fascinating that despite years of being trained to think scientifically, when it comes to self-assessment that intellectual rigor all goes out the window and I easily infer major character defects from as few as one data point.) But my point actually was that it's harder to ask for a replacement iPad if I dropped the first one than if it got trampled by stampeding antelope or something.
There's also the fact that the person you're asking for the free thing, while they do have formal authority to give it to you, is not personally the owner of the thing. I feel a lot less uncomfortable accepting a free sandwich from the owner of the falafel truck than from her nephew if he's minding the store while she's elsewhere.
It does get easier if I know that there's an Official Policy that I should get a free thingy if I ask for it. It felt ridiculous to ask my credit card bank to waive a late fee for no reason other than I didn't want to pay it, until I knew that it was official policy to waive late fees for anyone who asked.